Quiet Mourning

Today I laid awake and thought about you
It’s almost crippling sometimes
How much I miss you
How I wish you wouldn’t have gone away
And left us to go on with only memories

Thought about you teaching me to cook
But hating how I experimented with every spice and seasoning in the house
I remember that roasted chicken only you and I were brave enough to taste
Everyone agreed the smell was horrendous
But it tasted pretty good didn’t it

I thought about what it must have been like for you
This last past year
I wondered if you ever tried to warn me
If I just wasn’t listening to you
If I was telling you what I wanted to happen
And you were trying to tell me what was going to occur
Wondered if you lied to us
Told your girls you were fine
Knowing
The whole time
Knowing

I’m past the stage of being angry
Acceptance, maturity…
Life
Has taken over
But still
Still
It’s hard to swallow
Harder to breathe
Hardest to imagine the future
This morning

In loving Memory of
Debbie Jones
04/08/1955 – 09/05/2007

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